Rose
by tehedward
Summary: She loved all of her children, and she loved them all equally, but Rosalie held a special place in her heart.
1. Chapter 1

**Standard disclaimer, I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. This is a one shot it takes place after Bella has first met the rest of the Cullens but before the baseball game.**

**s**

**Rose**

**s**

"Rose, dear, may I come in?" Esme asks as she stands outside Rosalie's and Emmett's room. She keeps her voice low and quiet enough that she could have a private conversation with her daughter and best friend. Even in a house full of vampires, no one would be able to hear them. Rosalie had basically shut herself in her room all day now and she was beginning to get worried, she wouldn't even speak to Emmett right now so she hoped that maybe she would open up to her. Rosalie and she had, in her opinion, one of the more interesting and complex relationships in the family.

She loved all of her children, and she loved them all equally, but Rosalie held a special place in her heart. Rose was her eldest daughter and the past experiences that they both shared and the desires that they both had meant that they understood each other in a way that even their mates couldn't comprehend.

Carlisle was the love of her existence, what she felt for him was all encompassing, and he knew her better than anyone else in the world, and she knew that Rosalie felt the same way about Emmett. But neither of them had actually gone through the abuse, the rape that Rosalie and she had, they didn't have the sense of loss that she and Rosalie did over the fact that they could never have children. Their husbands could empathize, they could sympathize, but they couldn't comprehend. There was no way to understand that kind of pain, that kind of violation, that kind of loss, unless you experienced it.

But it wasn't just their pain that connected them either. While Rosalie was more blunt about it, more confrontational, nobody else worried about the family as a whole like she and Rosalie did. This family was everything to them and they wanted to do everything they could to protect it.

They also liked to go out and do things together. While Rosalie was more mechanically inclined her daughter was the one who often took an interest in what she, Esme, was doing. In every house she designed Rosalie was always there to help her pick things out, offer suggestions, or just provide her with some company. And she did the same, she honestly to this day, and despite Rosalie's best efforts, couldn't tell you the difference between a carburetor and a muffler, but she enjoyed sitting out in the garage with Rose and watching her as she worked on the cars. Rosalie had a gift with mechanics and she could do things with cars the same way Edward could do things with music. She was so passionate about it and it was great to watch. She wasn't much help, but Rosalie seemed to appreciate and enjoy the company.

They loved the same kinds of books, but couldn't agree on a movie to save their lives, and they loved to tease each other about it. Esme, while wanting to look nice didn't care for fashion the same way that Rosalie did, and certainly nowhere near the degree that Alice did. Rosalie had a bit of a darker and more biting sense of humor than she did, but she was also so much more outgoing than Esme ever was. She knew that it grated on Rosalie to be so reserved in the human world while Esme had always been a bit more of a homebody.

Rosalie was her daughter and her best friend and right now she was hurting, and she knew exactly what the cause of that hurt was. Bella Swan. Esme was so happy that Edward had finally found someone, he had been alone for so long that it was good to see him finally connect with someone. And she seemed like a… nice girl. She was a little twitchy, but she seemed sweet enough and it was obvious that she was smitten by her son. Esme was excited to get to know her.

Rosalie, however, was not. And she had brought up some very valid concerns. Edward was very adamant about not changing her, he wouldn't even discuss it, and that alone was a huge problem. One that could potentially get them all killed, but that wasn't Rose's only objection. The girl was still human, that meant her mere presence was painful for them to endure. Going to school was one thing, but if she was going to be coming over that would be a problem. This house was supposed to be their safe haven, a place for them to escape the temptation of human blood.

Edward had also divulged everything to the girl, all of their secrets were known to this new human. She wanted to support Edward and she was happy that he was finding love but even she hadn't been particularly thrilled with that bit of news. The girl seemed nice enough but they didn't know her. Carlisle and Emmett had been concerned as well and she had never seen Rosalie and Jasper that angry before. Alice had been able to calm Jasper down, barely, but it had taken the combined efforts of Emmett and herself to stop Rosalie from throwing Edward's piano at him.

Edward and Alice were both sure, completely positive, that they could trust Bella, that she was trustworthy which did provide some assurances. Alice swore up and down that she had no visions of Bella telling anyone anything, that Bella would keep their secret.

_"Unless she changes her mind, you're accurate, rarely ever wrong I'll admit. But we all know that you're not infallible, and that when you are wrong, you're really wrong."_ Rosalie had challenged. Alice hadn't appreciated that and now the two of them weren't speaking to each other. Rosalie was more confrontational about it than Esme would have been, but she did have a point. Alice was rarely wrong but the last time she had been, three humans had died.

As all of this is passing through Esme's mind, Rosalie still hadn't answered her yet so she tries calling out again. "Rosalie, please, may I come in?"

This time Esme doesn't wait for an answer she slowly opens the door and steps inside to see Rosalie standing by her window and staring out into the forest.

"I didn't say you could come in." She says, but there is no real bite in her voice, just quiet resignation.

"You also didn't tell me to go away." Esme replies with a smile as she moves to stand by Rosalie, and she can see a tiny smile pulling at Rosalie's lips.

It's silent between the two of them for a few minutes before Rosalie speaks up. "I don't want Edward to be alone, I do want him to find love. I want for him to have what Emmett and I have. I want for him to have what you and Carlisle, and Jasper and Alice all have. I do want that for him."

"I know that dear and so does everyone else."

"But he's doing this wrong, he's putting us all at risk and her as well. I know my brother, he's going to try and hide the darker side of what we are from her. Oh he'll tease her with it to be sure, I'm a monster, you shouldn't trust me, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But he won't actually tell her what it means to be what we are, he won't show her the truth. She's going to think that this kind of existence is a blessing, something to aspire to." Rosalie shakes her head in disgust.

"She deserves the chance to have a normal, mortal, life and with all things considered and if Edward gets his way, I don't see how this can end in anything but heart break. Edward won't change her, and eventually she'll grow old and she'll die and with what to show for it? So that she and Edward can spend the last few years of her life pretending he's her grandson, and what do you suppose is going to happen to Edward after she's gone? He may be a pretentious ass-hole-"

"Language." Esme reprimands, but there's no real force behind it.

Rosalie's features soften, and she feel's guilty for swearing in front of Esme. Esme had been raised to not swear and so she had always been sensitive to it. Charles, her ex-husband had loved to curse up a storm in front of her just to see her flinch, so they all tried to avoid doing it for her sake. Sometimes they slipped but Esme appreciated the effort.

"Right sorry, but you know what I mean, he's moody, he's judgmental, he drives me up the wall and there are days, weeks even, when I can't stand to be within a hundred miles of him and I know he feels the same way about me, but still… he's my brother and I may not always like him, but I do love him. If this girl is it for him, and I'm not convinced she is, but if she is, and he never plans to change her, what do you think he's going to do once she's gone?"

Esme looks down, because she knows exactly what Rosalie is talking about. Edward was dramatic, more so than anyone else in the family, and he often had a… twisted wasn't the word she wanted to use but it was close at times, view of life, love, and religion. She loved him like he was her son but she wasn't blind to his flaws. She knew that if this Bella girl was it for him, and she were to die, Edward would soon follow and a part of her wondered if he didn't ultimately hope for that outcome.

Edward despised what they were and made no secret of the fact that he believed they had no souls, that they were all eternally damned to hell. Esme didn't believe that, not for a single second, she believed that it was their actions that they would be judged by, the fact that they fought against their natures was what would count in the end, if and when that time came. A part of Edward wished for death, to face that final judgment, but another part of him craved life, wished to be proven wrong, but if that Bella girl was it, was who he was going to give his heart to and she were to die, she knew that any will to live would leave Edward.

"I just want to protect this family… it's all I have." Rosalie finishes softly.

Esme reaches over and places her hand on Rosalie's, squeezing it affectionately. "I have to believe that it will all work out, that this girl will love him and help him work through these issues that he has. That he has finally found his soul mate. I know what's at stake here and believe me I share all of your concerns but… he needs us to support him, now more than ever. We don't know what the future will hold, we have a good guess, but we don't know. I want him to be happy, I want all of you to be happy, and since he has decided to be with this Swan girl I've seen a spark of life in him that I have never seen before. It gives me hope that everything will work out in the end. I think for the first time he has a shot at happiness and I think this will change him and for the better, we just have to have faith, and we need to support him, now more than ever."

Rosalie lets out a sigh. "I can't support this, I know you can see a happy ending in this but all I can see is devastation. This human girl is going to destroy our family-"

"Rose-"

"Please Esme, let me finish. I can't support what I believe is going to be the end of my brother. I don't see how he can possibly love her, I think he's intrigued by her, he can't hear her thoughts and she's his singer, I think he finds it interesting but I don't think its love. I also think that this is all going to end really badly for all of us, but… you're right Edward does need our support. So…"

Rosalie lets out another sigh, "I guess the best I can do in this situation is back off, I won't fight him on this, but… I can't support it. I'm not convinced it's real and I think it's just going to end badly for him."

Esme moves her hand and wraps it around Rosalie's shoulder and brings her in for a hug, and Rosalie allows it happen and she rests her head on Esme's shoulder.

"I hope I'm wrong." Rosalie says softly after a moment.

"Me too." Esme says, kissing Rosalie on the forehead.

After a couple minutes of silence pass Rosalie speaks up again, this time in a wistful, kind of hopeful but teasing voice. "Why couldn't he have fallen for Tanya? Tanya's a sweetheart, she's beautiful, smart, fun, she's strong willed, she could keep Edward in line-"

Esme chuckles at that, she liked Tanya as well and had been rather hopeful when the woman had first shown an interest in Edward.

"Plus if he got together with her then he could live up in Denali and we wouldn't have to put up with him as much." Rosalie finishes.

"Rosalie." She reprimands.

"What? We'd visit… occasionally."

Esme just arches a brow and looks at her.

"Fine… your right, I'm sorry… plus I like Tanya, I wouldn't really wish that on her."

Esme rolls her eyes before she begins to move, taking Rosalie's arm in her own and leading them out of the blonde's room. "Come on, your eyes are looking dark and you're just a little too snarky right now, I think you need to feed. Let's go see if Emmett and Carlisle are up for a hunt."

**S**

** So I have this head canon that Rosalie and Esme are really close. They just really connected over the years and next to Emmett, Esme is Rosalie's strongest connection to the Cullen family and vice versa and that their relationship is similar to Carlisle's and Edward's. I don't know, I just like the idea that they're really close. I have nothing to back these thoughts up with, I've only seen each movie once, and I've only read the books once, and I don't recall there being anything in them to suggest that this is right… or wrong, mind you. The books and movies are all about Bella and Edward, which is fine, if not a little boring to me. I love Twilight fics that explore the rest of the Cullen's with Rosalie being my favorite character and so I thought I would do a little one shot. And I'll readily admit that most of my Twilight knowledge comes from fan fiction, so I have no idea how close to canon either of these characters are here, if at all. Although if I cared about canon I wouldn't be on this site lol.**


	2. Jealousy

** Standard Disclaimer, I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.**

**Chapter 2: Jealousy**

**s**

Esme was standing out on the front porch leaning over the railing and staring out into the woods. They were finally about to leave Forks and in her opinion they couldn't get out of here fast enough. Too much had a happened here and she just needed a fresh start.

She was so out of it that she hadn't even noticed Rosalie sliding up next to her until the blond vampire had taken one of her hands in her own. Esme looks up slightly surprised but then gives her a warm smile. The only person more excited to leave Forks than her was Rosalie.

They stay like that for a while, just enjoying the silence and each other's company before Rosalie speaks. Both of them staring out into the woods.

"It's okay that you're angry, I know I am."

Esme shakes her head, she should have known that her Rose would have seen through her. It was easier to hide since Bella almost always had her shield up for Edward now, but she guessed that something must have slipped through and caught Rosalie's attention.

"I'm not angry."

"You can repeat it to yourself and to whomever you want to over and over again, but I know you so much better than that. You're angry and I'm here to tell you that it's okay."

Esme shakes her head. "No, it's not. He is my son, she is now my daughter and I should feel nothing but joy for the both of them."

"Why?"

Esme shakes her head again. "Because that is what I do, I am the mother in this family, the compassionate one, I have to be happy for everyone. I don't get to be angry or jealous."

"True, you are those things, but first and foremost to me, you are my best friend. The one person in this family that I can talk to about anything, and I know I'm yours. You can tell me because I'll tell you. I am, I am so angry and I am so jealous. Don't get me wrong, I love Nessie, but the fact is that while she is a gorgeous child and I love her, she will never be mine and she will never be yours, and Bella who never wanted it got our happy ending. She gets eternity with her true love, she gets to keep her human family, and she has the child that you and I never will. I've come to care for her and I am happy for her, it doesn't change the fact that I had to sit back and watch someone else get my dream."

"It's not fair…" Esme whispers softly. "I… only got to hold my baby for… for… it felt like a second and then he was gone… and I can never… I'll never be a mother again, I'll never have that feeling of holding a little child close to me and knowing that it's mine, my baby."

"You've made due with us, but it's not the same is it? I mean I've dreamed about motherhood for as long as I can remember. I've only ever wanted a little baby to hold and call my own and to grow old with the man I love and watch our child grow. I can dream all I want but I'll never experience that… but you, you had it. It was for only a second, but you still had it and then it was ripped from you.

I've never envied you that. I can only dream of what it's like, but you've actually experienced it and you will never know it again… I can only imagine how much harder all this is for you. To see someone who didn't even want it, get the dream that you and I crave with our entire beings."

"I should be happy for her…" Esme wishes that she could cry. "I should be thrilled, and I am… but…"

"You don't have to say it if you don't want to, I just don't want you to think that you can't or that you are alone."

The two women finally turn to look at each other, "I can't say it." Esme says, a quiet desperation in her voice. "If I do I won't ever be able to hold it back. I look at them and…" God how she wished she could cry.

"You look at them and it's a knife to the heart. The pain is worse that even the transformation, and you are so jealous of them. And you hate yourself for it too, you feel sick inside, because you do love and care about them, you want them to have a happy ending. But you feel how you feel and you feel cheated, like God is showing you what you will never have. And every time you look at her you feel like the universe is rubbing it in your face that somehow someone else beat the odds or destiny or fate or whatever and you didn't. Like what did she do to be so blessed and not me?" Rosalie says all this softly and gently, giving voice to Esme's own deepest and darkest feelings. Rosalie pulls her into a hug and Esme doesn't fight it and she lets herself get lost in the other girl's arms.

"It's not fair." She whimpers.

"No… it's not."

**s**

**So I might actually turn this into a series of one shots, I'm not quite certain yet. If I do they will all be interconnected and in no particular order. I do it with another story of mine and it's done fairly well so we'll see. The problem with that format is that unless inspiration hits, updates are few and far between. If I do it I would try to cover all of the Cullen's but it would definitely be a very Rosalie and then Esme heavy centric story. Like I said I'm undecided right now. But I do hope you all enjoyed this little chapter no matter what I decide to do.**


	3. Mortality

** Timeline wise, I'm not sure when this chapter takes place, it's sometime just after Alice and Jasper have joined the Cullen's and obviously before the book Twilight, also I could not for the life of me discover one of the character's mentioned name so I had to make one up. I apologize, if one of you does know the name then let me know and I'll edit it in, thanks. Standard Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of its characters.**

**s**

**Mortality**

**s**

"I really don't want to talk right now, leave." Rosalie snarls as Esme hesitantly enters into her and Emmett's room, which like the rest of the house had been torn apart.

"I am so sorry."

"I said leave!" She yells, her eyes flashing with rage and anguish. "I don't even want to look at you, any of you! I hate you, GET OUT!"

However Esme doesn't take it personally and instead she steps forward and wraps the other girl in a hug. "I am so very sorry." She whispers softly, she can feel Rosalie tense in her arms, but she doesn't pull away or attack, so Esme takes it that she's on the right track.

"It's not fair!" Rosalie rages. "I hate it, I hate this stupid existence, and everyone it! And I hate Carlisle for condemning me to this! Why didn't he just let me die!? I hate him… I hate him…" Rosalie trails off her shoulders sagging in defeat as she rests her forehead on Esme's shoulder, wishing for tears that would never come, the anger and despair festering inside her like a hurricane of miasma.

Esme runs her fingers through the younger woman's hair, gently stroking her and offering her condolences. Rosalie had just learned that one of her brother's had died in a drunken accident. Worse for Rosalie though was that she would not even be able to attend the funeral because she would be recognized.

Initially she was going to go, she didn't care, her baby brother was dead and she was going to go to him, but the family had to step in and remind her what was at risk. Her parents, her other brother, people who had known her all those years ago, they would all be there and they would all know instantly who she was and then they would all be exposed, risking not only their lives but the lives of the humans as well. The Volturi wouldn't tolerate any breech of the secret and if they found out they would kill all involved just to be safe.

The rage that had taken over Rosalie at that point was unlike anything they had ever experienced before, she hadn't hurt them, she had had enough presence of mind to not attack them, but she had taken her rage out on everything else, literally destroyed their house to the point where they were going to have to move. Furniture, walls, the floor, she had been destruction incarnate as the crushing reminder of the state of her existence and all that she had lost came crumbling down on her.

"My brother is dead…" Rosalie whispers, "He's dead and I can't go to him, I can't see him, or say goodbye, nothing…"

Esme clenches her eyes shut and just holds Rosalie a little bit tighter not saying anything, because honestly, what could she say? What could she possibly say to make it alright for her? All of the condolences in the world, all of the useless platitudes and expressions meant absolutely nothing when faced with the harsh reality of the situation. Rosalie was immortal and unchanging and her family wasn't and the death of her brother was but the first of many she would have to endure as time passed them by.

"My mother, my father, they now think they've lost two children, ha…" Rosalie scoffs humorlessly, "They have lost two children, only one of them died and the other abandoned them for a fate worse than hell… and Robert, little Robby has now lost both his big sister and now his big brother… I should be there for him… he needs me… I have to go."

Esme pulls back just enough so that she can look Rosalie in the eyes, "You can't sweetheart, I know you want to and I would give anything for you to be able to go, but you can't." She says as gently as she can, hoping that it will lessen the blow and knowing that it won't.

"Please Esme, please… please let me go, please… I'll be careful, I won't be seen, I promise."

"You can't. I wish you could sweetheart but you can't." Esme could feel her heart breaking at the look of despair and hopelessness that settled onto Rosalie's face. Esme had been her last hope and for the sake of their lives she had to say no.

"Can I be alone now, please?" Rosalie asks meekly and all Esme can do is nod her head. She places her lips to Rosalie's forehead and then turns to leave. As she reaches the door she turns and looks at Rosalie one last time, wanting to say something, anything to help ease the pain, but nothing comes to her. As she shuts the door behind her the last thing she sees is Rosalie standing there, having not moved a muscle, staring forlornly into nothing.

Esme lets out a sigh as she heads downstairs and into the living room, hating the helplessness that she feels right now, wanting to make things better, but knowing nothing could heal this wound of Rosalie's except for time. But that was part of the problem, they had nothing but time. She looks to Carlisle, Edward, and Alice who had all had to play the bad guys in telling Rosalie she couldn't go to the funeral. They had all obviously heard the conversation and each of them looked wracked with guilt.

"I'm sorry, but it wouldn't have ended well." Alice says softly, this was the first time one of her visions had had an adverse effect on someone and so she was feeling a little lost. Unfortunately, no matter how many scenarios she ran, someone always recognized her.

"It's not your fault dear."

"If we could let her go… if we could let her go safely we would." Carlisle says, he looks stricken and Esme goes over to him to try and provide some comfort.

"How is she Edward?" Esme asks, she normally wouldn't pry but she was scared for her daughter and best friend right now.

Edward sighs, "She's reliving memories right now, some good, most of them… Alice, when will Emmett and Jasper get back?"

"Ten minutes, Emmett will be able to reach her." Alice says sadly, wishing she could do more.

"We should probably get started, we'll have to leave here pretty quickly." Carlisle says softly, motioning to the mess that used to be their living room.


	4. Wounded

** Standard Disclaimer, I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. This chapter takes place after Breaking Dawn and a little bit before Jealousy.**

**s**

**Wounded**

**s**

"So… I'm thinking maybe you and I should get a new place this next time we move, maybe on our own." Emmett offers up, trying to be as nonchalant as possible.

He and Rosalie were currently in their bedroom, he was laying on their bed watching Rosalie who was trying on different outfits.

"Huh? No we can't do that." Rosalie says distractedly as she smooth's out the red skirt she was wearing and twists around a bit to get a better look at herself in the mirror.

He hadn't been sure how to bring this up but it had been on his mind for a while now. He needed to get his Rosie out of here for a while. This whole thing with Nessie was messing with her head badly and he wanted to put some distance between them. He had nothing against Nessie at all, she was a funny little thing, a little strange but overall family and he loved her like he loved the rest of the family, but Rosalie was his wife and this whole situation had been hell on her.

When she was with Renesmee his wife lit up almost like nothing he had ever seen before. It was like she transformed fully into the angel that he always knew she was. He didn't need Jasper's power to be able to literally feel the happy vibes that came off of his wife. Being with Nessie helped to complete a part of his wife that he knew he'd never be able to fulfill. And if that was all there was to it, he'd be over the moon with joy. But when Nessie was off with someone else, usually Jacob, it was scary for him. She seemed to withdraw in on herself and there was this void there that scared him. He'd always known that not being able to be a mother had hurt his wife, part of being her husband was learning to help her deal with that. It was a responsibility that he took very seriously. But it wasn't until Renesmee had come along and he'd seen just how powerful an affect she had on Rosalie that he realized just how deep and truly terrible that wound was.

She needed a break, just a little space. Just a year or two to build herself back up would be perfect, then they could come back and everything would be fine. Because right now this was killing his wife and he needed to think of her first. The drama was over, Bella was fine, the Volturi were gone, and the wolves weren't a threat anymore, it was time to heal.

"Babe…" he sighs, sitting up and moving to the edge of the bed.

"Hmm?" She hums distractedly.

"Babe, come here, I need to talk to you. This is important." He says patting the spot next to him.

Rosalie looks at him curiously and sits down next to him. He was rarely serious but when he was Rosalie always took note. People didn't give her Emmett nearly enough credit. "What's wrong Em?"

Emmett takes a moment to take her hands in his own and places a couple of kisses to them. "Rose, you know I love this family, you know that I love Renesmee and you know that I am so happy for you two when you get a chance to bond. You know that."

"Of course, what's going on Emmett?"

"I love them all so very much, but… that's absolutely nothing compared to how much I love you."

"I love you too Em-"

"And that's what makes this so incredibly hard for me to say. I think that… right now, this place isn't a good place for you to be right now."

Rosalie looks like she'd just been slapped. "What? What do you mean?"

"I know how much you want to be a mother and I don't think there's a woman out there who would be a better one than you. But… Renesmee isn't your child."

"You don't think I know that!" She snaps at him standing up and glaring at him. "Why is everyone on my case about this!? Do you think I'm stupid, that I can't comprehend that all I am and ever will be is her aunt!?"

"No, it's not that-"

"Then what, what is it exactly!? What have I done wrong this time, because apparently I'm incapable of doing anything right, even loving my niece!?"

"Hey, hey, hey," Emmett says soothingly as he slowly stands up and goes over to his angry wife. "That's not what I was saying at all, not even close." He says as he wraps his arms around her.

Rosalie closes her eyes and sighs, "I'm sorry… I just… I'm tired of always being the bad guy in this family."

"That, that right there is exactly what I'm talking about. This isn't a healthy place for you right now. This place, the way we're living, Bella, and Edward, and Renesmee, all of it is hitting every single button you have. When you're with her, you are so fantastic that it breaks my heart. Because it shows me just how much you want it and it kills me that you can't have it and that I can't give it to you. But when you're away from her it's even worse. It's like you shut down and fade away. It's not good for you and I think that we need to take a break, we need some distance between you so that you can re-acclimate."

"Emmett she's…"

"I know, she's aging so fast, but something that we all have to accept is that she isn't a normal child. Give it a couple of years and she'll be physically an adult, mentally, she's already there. With all that's happened this family needs to find its new normal and I don't know that you can do that here."

Rosalie looks down and away, his words hitting her hard. "You are so strong babe, so tough, and these past two years you've had to be stronger than ever. None of this has been easy on you and I know I wasn't the most supportive of you with the whole Bella thing-"

"You were doing what you thought was right, I know that." She says softly.

"I know you do, but it doesn't change the fact that you and I were on opposite sides of the issue."

"We've disagreed before."

"Never about something this serious though. I could have smacked her when she called you." Emmett says seriously.

"She was doing what she had to do to protect her child. If anything it made me respect her more."

"I know that, and she made the right choice in calling you for help, nobody would have protected that baby the way you did. Doesn't change the fact that she knowingly manipulated you and used your dream against you to set you between her and Edward. Because she knew, she absolutely knew that to protect that baby there isn't anything you wouldn't have done. You took a lot of abuse from Edward and Jacob in order to protect Renesmee from them."

Rosalie shrugs like it's no big deal, but he knew how hard that had been on her. "Edward and I have never gotten along and I don't think it's physically possible for me to care any less about what Jacob has to say on any issue. Bella was just trying to protect her baby, I was glad I could help."

"It doesn't change the fact that watching her get what you have always wanted more than anything cut you deeply. It doesn't change the fact that you've had to put up with a lot of shit since moving here to Forks. I want some distance for you babe, a chance for you to heal."

"I don't think I can leave Em. Maybe you're right, maybe being here isn't good for me but the thought of being away from her at all… I can't do it. I just can't."

"Babe-"

"Look, I'm all for getting out of Forks, the sooner the better. And to be honest, I never want to return here ever again. We will, because I'm just not that lucky, but I don't want to. I agree, we need to move, but I can't… I accept that I'm not her mother, that is Bella, one-hundred and ten percent. I'm not stupid, I understand that. And I'm not trying to steal Renesmee from Bella, I just… I want to be a part of her life too. That's not so bad is it, just wanting the chance to be a part of her life?

"No, of course not."

"I can't leave her. I love her more than she'll ever love me, but that's true of most of my relationships…" She says with a weak smile.

"Hey, don't talk like that."

"It's true, I know I'm difficult and I know I can be selfish-"

"No more than the rest of us. And you can also be incredibly selfless too. This is exactly why I want to get you away from here. These past two years have done everything they can to tear you down. You need a break to build yourself back up again."

"I'm sorry Emmett, I just… I can't leave her."

Emmett just pulls her in closer and holds her tightly. He'd wait awhile before bringing this up again, but he would bring it up again.

**s**

** Author's Note: I'm sorry, but you will never convince me that Bella having Renesmee didn't absolutely devastate Rosalie. Being an Aunt is nowhere near the same as actually getting to be a mother, which is what Rosalie has wanted since the beginning, even before she was a vampire.**


	5. Choices

**Standard Disclaimer, I don't own Twilight or any of its characters. This Chapter takes place approximately twenty years after Breaking Dawn.**

**s**

**Choices**

**s**

"What is her deal!?" Renesmee snaps angrily as she storms into the main house where Rosalie and Esme were currently looking over some magazines, searching for ideas on how to decorate the new house.

Rosalie and Esme both look up at Renesmee and then share a look with each other. One that they had shared many times over the past twenty years. It looked like Renesmee and Bella had been fighting, again. Rosalie gives a slight nod to Esme, knowing that in this situation the other woman would probably handle it a little better.

"What's wrong dear?" Esme asks.

"It's her! She just… she doesn't get it!"

"Get what?"

"Anything! She's just so… Urrrrggh! She's so infuriating sometimes!"

Esme and Rosalie exchange another look. "Renesmee, look at me." Esme says, her voice isn't forceful, it rarely ever is but there is a motherly order to it that always impressed Rosalie. It demanded respect and obedience without crossing any lines or being patronizing. "What doesn't she get?"

"That I want more from this life than to be someone's soul mate! I want to actually live, I don't need someone to complete me, I'm complete all on my own! I'm not half a person, I'm a whole person!" Renesmee all but snarls.

"Sorry…" She mumbles quietly. Getting angry at Esme or her Aunt Rose wouldn't help anything and on most issues she knew they could see her side of it. They got it, they knew where she was coming from. Her father always sided with her mother and Jacob's opinion was… skewed.

"It's okay sweetheart. We know you're upset but would you care to expand on that a little bit, tell us what's going on?" Rosalie asks.

She stops and takes a moment to calm herself down, thinking about her mother's reaction when she had told her was getting her angry again. When she finally trusts herself not to snap at them she speaks. "I… yesterday I told Jacob that I didn't want to date, that I loved him but it wasn't romantic from my side. He seemed a little hurt at first but then kind of relieved you know… like something finally clicked into place for him. I told him that if he wanted to leave that he could, that he was free. We talked for hours after that you know, about everything, about what led to this, what we both wanted in life."

Renesmee smiles but both Esme and Rosalie can see it's a sad sort of smile. "He's thinking of going back home to La Push and spending the last couple of years his father has left with him, and I think that's great. It's not fair that I ripped him away from his father. And me, I think I want to get a little more involved with school stuff. Maybe join a club and make some friends. You know, be as normal as I can and not have to be constantly worrying about what Jacob is thinking or how he feels about it. He thinks that kind of stuff is lame, school clubs and things like that. And I know that we have to be careful, I get that, but if Carlisle can be a doctor then why can't I be a cheerleader or on the volleyball team or on the homecoming committee. I'm alive, but I want to live, I want to have all of these experiences, otherwise what's the point in all of this."

Esme nods her head, "Of all of us, you are the best equipped to fitting in with the humans. I don't see why you can't do all of those things and more."

"Exactly! But my mom, she doesn't get it! She's all, _"How can you send him away, you're his entire world, you two are made for each other?"_ And I'm just standing there thinking that the only reason he's here is because he literally belongs to me. He doesn't have a choice, if I say jump, he has to say how high. If the imprint didn't freaking brainwash him into being happy there is no way he would actually enjoy this life, it's not him. He needs distance from us, especially from me. So that he can finally start to live his own life, make his own decisions. The imprint… it makes it impossible for him to make his own choices because it forces him to always consider me and while I have loved having him in my life… if I fall in love I want it to be my choice… not because some mystical bond tells me that we're meant to be. I want to choose who I end up with, if anyone, and I want that for him too. He didn't choose me, I'm not his choice, mom was his choice and then by some sick joke of the universe he got her daughter as a consolation prize. That's not love, that's twisted. It's not fair to him or me or anyone."

"You've given this a lot of thought, haven't you?"

Renesmee nods her head. "For a long time now."

"And you are of course correct, neither of you should be forced into a relationship that maybe neither of you want." Esme says consolingly.

"Really, because according to my _mother_ I may as well have destroyed our family!"

"She didn't say that did she?" Rosalie asks, sounding angry.

Renesmee shakes her head. "No… but it's like she took it personally that I didn't want to be with him, you know, romantically. Like I was doing it to spite her or something."

"Of course she did." Rosalie scoffs, rolling her eyes.

"Rose." Esme reprimands her before looking back to Renesmee. "Your mother and Jacob have been friends for a long time, I'm sure she just… hoped that you two might find happiness together."

"What choice does he have in the matter? If it's what I wanted then he would have to be the perfect boyfriend, lover, husband, if it's what I want then he has to do it." Renesmee says, "That's why I could never fall in love with him... no, I am. I am in love with him" Renesmee smiles at them, but it looks heartbroken like she's falling apart on the inside.

"I love him but I could never ever be with him. Jacob… he's everything that I would ever look for in someone to love. He's kind, he's brave, and he's gentle and I can see you rolling your eyes aunt Rose." Renesmee says with a soft chuckle. "I know you two have never gotten along and probably never will and that's okay. You both kept it civil around me and I appreciate that, I'll miss him when he leaves… even thinking about it right now hurts worse than I ever imagined… and I could have easily spent forever with him… if it weren't for the imprint. How's that for irony, the thing that's supposed to bind us together for all eternity is the one reason I could never be with him. Ha!" Renesmee barks out an incredulous laugh as the tears begin to pool around her eyes.

"I love him… but I will never know if he has ever loved me. The imprint gives him no choice, but I have always wondered, I still do… if it weren't there… would he have ever chosen me?" She asks, her voice cracking.

Rosalie gets up and wraps her niece in a hug who is shaking, trying so hard not to cry. "I'm so sorry sweetheart, I know this is tough on you and my feelings for Jacob aside, I think you're doing the right thing. You're trying to put him first and that's what love is. You said he looked relieved when you told him you don't hold romantic feelings for him, I think that's it right there. I think he finally feels like he has a choice. I think you're doing the right thing for both of you."

"It hurts and I hate it, but I couldn't live with myself if I forced him to stay. And he would too, he'd be anything I asked him to be. It's not right… I hate it… but it's what's best for him. And maybe someday… who knows?" Renesmee whimpers.

"Rosalie is right dear you're doing what you feel is the right thing for the both of you. You've both been through a lot together but this is still your life. You have to make the decisions and live with the consequences so I'm going to say this, and it will be hard for you to hear sweetheart, but it needs to be said." Esme says softly, gently tugging Renesmee away from Rosalie so that she could look her in the eyes.

"If you're going to let him go, if you're doing this to give him choices, then you have to let him go completely. You're paths may cross again but if you do this, it won't be right or fair of you to pull him back just because you'll miss him. You're paths may cross again someday but if he is able to start a life away from you with someone else, you'll have to accept that." Esme says softly. "Because with the imprint, you could. He could find someone else, fall in love, start a family, and he would leave them in a heartbeat if you asked. So if you're letting him go, you have to let him go and it has to be with the assumption that it is going to be forever."

Renesmee just nods her head, trying so hard not to cry. "I know…" She chokes out before finally breaking down. Esme wraps her in a tight hug and Rosalie comes up behind and runs a comforting hand up and down Renesmee's back.

"It's okay dear, it's all going to be okay."

**s**

** I don't know, as far as imprinting goes that would always be something I would worry about. Do they love me for me, or are they only there because of magical impulse. I think as time progresses and Renesmee matures that whole concept will kind of horrify her. I'm sure that many people disagree with me but that's kind of my take on it. I mean there's Jacob, someone she's known her whole life and that she truly cares for and even loves, and yet he's only there because he's magically bound. I think Renesmee will eventually force a split for his sake and hers. I also think that Renesmee will be different than Bella in that the supernatural world holds little interest for her. She grew up strange and surrounded by the supernatural. I think that what she'll want and crave is normalcy, so she and Bella clash over that, because Bella chose the supernatural world over a human one and she doesn't see the appeal of normal. Bella and Renesmee love each other, obviously, but they tend to disagree fundamentally and so they butt heads over things. So when it comes to motherly advice, or she needs to vent, for that I think she would go to Esme or Rosalie. **


	6. Family Meeting

** Disclaimer, I don't own Twilight. This chapter is just a fun little family meeting between the Cullen's. It's meant to be lighthearted, because while they have their issues the Cullen's are a family, and I refuse to believe that they're all doom and gloom all of the time. Also I really wanted to show a… if not sisterly, then at least friendly, dynamic between Rosalie and Alice. This takes place several months before the Cullen's move to Forks.**

**s**

**Family Meeting**

**s**

"Family meeting!" Alice chirps with excitement, practically dancing into the living room and sitting down next to Rosalie. Rosalie always assumed that she must have done some kind of ballet or something when she was a human because even for a vampire Alice was incredibly graceful.

As everyone files in Rosalie sets aside her book and gives Alice a little nudge. "Alright what's this about?"

"We're moving soon and we need to set up our new cover I.D's." Alice whispers back.

"Oh god…" Rosalie groans. This. This right here, establishing a cover was always the worst part of moving. It was a horrible juggling act of what would work versus what would make them not want to kill themselves for being so incredibly awful versus what would allow them to stay in one place for the longest time.

Alice giggles. "Sorry Rosie, you're not going to like this one, but it's the best shot we have at staying for a long time." Alice says, knowing that longevity was the key to appeasing Rosalie who hated to move.

It takes Rosalie a second to figure out what Alice is implying and when she does she can't stop the groan that escapes. She was fairly indifferent to the majority of their cover stories, but there was one that she vigorously hated. "Really Alice, again? No, come on there has to be a better option."

"What did you have in mind Alice?" Esme asks as she and Carlisle step into the room, followed closely by Emmett who immediately takes the other seat next to Rosalie, kissing her on the cheek as he does so and wrapping an arm around her.

"Oh God, really Alice?" Edward groans as he steps into the living room, folding his arms and scowling.

"Yes really." She chirps happily in that way that always annoyed Rosalie because Alice knew that she was right and was going to get her way.

"What's got you all grumpy?" Jasper asks her as he steps enters the living room, the last one to join them.

"Shut up, you're not going to be any happier than I am about this." Rosalie grumbles.

"Happier with what?" He asks confused.

"Nah, he'll be fine." Alice says with complete confidence.

"Thanks darlin'… fine with what?" He asks her suspiciously. He didn't need his powers to feel the excitement and the joy that was currently radiating off of Alice, which made him all the more suspicious. He loved his wife dearly but that didn't change the fact that of all of them she was the sneakiest.

Edward chuckles at that thought and gives him a nod of agreement.

"Apparently we're deciding our cover story for when we move to Forks in a couple of weeks." Emmett says.

Carlisle's lips quirk into an amused smile and even Esme seems slightly amused. "Do we have to be here for this, because we already know our cover?" Carlisle asks. If the others couldn't come to an agreement then he would step in and help smooth things out, but for the most part he left their cover stories to them. It was their lives and they had to live with them. As for him and Esme, young Doctor and his absolutely gorgeous architect or interior designer wife, depending on Esme's mood, worked for them just fine.

"Yes you have to be here, dad." Alice says with an eye roll and a very sarcastic emphasis on the word "dad."

The look of horror on Jaspers face as well as the almost identical looks of distain on Edward's and Rosalie's faces causes Esme to turn her face into Carlisle's shoulder to try and hide her laughter.

"Oh darlin' no, please, c'mon, you can't be serious?" He asks his wife, there was only one reason why Alice would call Carlisle dad.

"See! Can you talk some sense into her?" Rosalie huffs.

"She's not changing her mind, she's seen it." Edward growls.

"Oh come on, it'll be great." Alice says, beaming.

"Well then you do it, why subject the rest of us to it?" Rosalie asks.

"Wait, I'm lost, what are we doing?" Emmett asks.

"High school, and you all have to do it too because it doesn't work unless it's all of us. I have foreseen it." Alice says imperiously, a smug look on her face.

"High school, sweet!" Emmett laughs, reaching over and high-fiving Alice. He was the only other one who enjoyed using the high school student cover other than Alice, mostly because it allowed him to mess with the students and teachers a bit.

"See Emmett's excited." Alice says.

"Well then you two be high school students, Jasper and I can be… I don't know, Carlisle younger twin siblings or something and get a job or go to college. I mean come on, if we're going to be forced to go to school yet again then at least let us do college."

"And what about me?" Edward asks, "I don't particularly feel like going through high school again either."

"You could always stay here, Mrs. Bushwick seems awfully fond of you." Rosalie offers up innocently. Mrs. Bushwick was their 92 year old neighbor.

"You're funny, really, I'm laughing." Edward says dryly.

"Just a thought." Rosalie smirks.

"It won't work in Forks unless we all go to school, it's too small. People will talk even more if two different families who look so much alike move into different places. Nice call on the twin thing though, you should totally go with that." Alice says, looking at her husband and Rosalie appraisingly.

"Yes, but high school?" Jasper asks, "That's putting me in some pretty tight quarters with a lot of potential victims.

"You've done it before Jazz."

"Right, and it was hell on earth though and I almost slipped up. We had to move remember."

"So you moved a little fast, no one saw anything concrete."

"I don't know about this darlin'-"

"No we have to, trust me it'll be fantastic. Besides, I don't have any human memories and-"

"No, no way, you've already used that as an excuse get your way this year, you don't get to use it twice." Rosalie says firmly.

"Really? For what, I could have sworn I was saving it for this." Alice says with a pout.

"When we went to Paris for the fashion show instead of Tokyo for the technology exhibit." Rosalie says with an eye roll. "You've already used not having human memories as an excuse this year and as per our agreement you don't get to use it again until next year."

Alice snaps her fingers, "Darn… oh well, I've still seen it and it's still our best option."

"I don't even understand why we're moving to Forks anyway, the Quileute's made it pretty clear we aren't welcome there." Rosalie says, switching tactics. Maybe a moving to a different location would mean a different cover story.

"Ah they're not so tough." Emmett says with a grin.

"We're going because I liked the little town and it's my turn to pick our move." Esme says with a teasing grin.

"Yes, but what if instead of Forks we did Seattle instead." Rosalie offers. "We get all of the benefits of the cloud cover, no mangy werewolves, and most importantly we don't have to do the high school thing. Those who want to do school can, and those of us who don't can find something else."

"Did you have anything particular in mind?" Carlisle asks, noting that a blush would not have looked out of place on Rosalie's face.

"Well… I was thinking that maybe I would get a job this time around, I was going to put in some applications at a couple of the women's centers in Seattle… but whatever it's no big deal."

"It is a big deal, working is a quite bit different than going to school, there are other trials you have to face in order to do it and in some ways I think it's much harder for our kind to hold a job than go to school, but if you feel you're up for it then I think it's a fantastic idea." Carlisle says with a smile. He was always so proud of Rosalie and the control that she maintained, if she felt she was ready to work and hold a job then that was a huge step forward for her.

"But you could do that next time we move right?" Alice says. "Please, it has to be this set up, it just has to be, please come do high school with us."

"Why, what's going on Alice? Is there something you're not sharing?" Esme asks.

"She's seen something." Edward says, a slight accusation in his voice.

"Darlin' care to share with the rest of us?"

"Alright, it's nothing concrete, but something big is going to happen to us when we move to Forks. I don't know what, things are still in motion, but it'll be huge."

Rosalie glares at Alice. "Is it good or bad?"

"Of course it's good, do you think I wouldn't warn you if it wasn't?"

"Considering that you weren't going to tell us at all, I'd say you don't know if it is good or bad."

Alice gives her a hurt look. "Do you honestly think I would keep something bad that was going to happen to myself?"

Rosalie lets out a sigh. "No, of course not." Rosalie says apologetically.

"I know you were excited about finally working, you've worked hard for your control and this was kind of a light at the end of the tunnel for you, but it's really important that you be there at the school with us. I don't know why, like I said everything is still in motion. I just know a huge change is going to happen with this move. I don't think it will be bad, but I can't get this vision out of my head of the five of us at school. So please Rosalie, please will you do this? For me."

Rosalie groans, knowing she's about to give in and hating herself for it. It was hard to deny Alice anything and this was obviously important to her.

"You can have my turn when it's time for us to pick where we move again." Alice throws in, wanting to sweeten the deal for her sister. She knew this was disappointing for Rosalie. Up until Esme had decided on Forks Alice had been getting a stream of visions of Rosalie working and actually thriving. Alice had been really excited for her. It was only once Forks was chosen that the visions changed, Alice wasn't sure what was going to happens she just knew that things needed to be done a certain way.

"Alright fine." Rosalie agrees. "Damn pixie." She mutters under breath as she nudges Alice affectionately to show there's no real hard feelings.

Alice beams at her sister, "Perfect, now that that's settled-"

"Wait a minute." Edward growls. "What about the rest of us, just because Rosalie agreed to this doesn't mean-"

"Oh give it up Edward." Alice laughs. "Carlisle and Esme aren't really affected by this so they don't really care. Emmett's as excited as I am, Jasper will do it because he loves me and I really, really, really want him to."

Here Jasper shrugs his shoulders because, hey, she wasn't wrong.

"And as for you, you'll put up a fuss but ultimately you're a big pushover and you're going to agree to do it in the end anyways, the only one I really needed to convince was Rosalie and now that it's all settled we're good. Our cover is established and the family meeting is adjourned."


End file.
